sometimes i drown myself in thoughts, chasing after a dream or memories that secretly i know, will never happen.

sometimes i tell myself to let go, only realising i am clinging tigher and tigher to the past.

sometimes i step out of my comfort zone, only to realise my comfort zone is there right by your side.

sometimes i wish to move on, only to realise i really want time to rewind.

sometimes i fall, because i want you to be there to catch me.

sometimes i say i want to die, but in fact, i really want to be saved.

but at the end of it, it comes down to one thing. i love you, and i want to be happy.

forgetting you will hurt, but what i am going now is excruciating.

forgive and forget. a famous saying can mean so much right now.

i will forgive you, so i can forget you, so i can move on, to be with my friends and truly smile, once again.

words unspoken will be left unspoken, that's fate for me.

so here's to you, i am done. you will never see this side of me again.

moved to www.deinetwegen.onsugar.com .

you know if i keep getting blamed for things i really feel so maligned for.

i rather cut myself and bleed to death.

cut cut cut cut cut.

i just wish that

i can be my happy & carefree self again.

someone can enlighten both me and you.

i stop being a BITCH. fuck -.-

i cut bangs and its all charlene's fault. ):

Okay I've had it.

Bad end to a rather okay day? ):

The urge is so bad...

10 minutes ago i was still angry and pissed and crying and what not with my mom,

now i am okay and feeling so damn guilty and sad and bla

my life is falling apart again when i try to pick it up ):

I need anger management sessions. & Yunwei is right.

I need to see a psychiatrist.

the only thing i can do is disappoint my dad, piss my mum off, irritate my sister, let down my friends, get someone i treasure so much to think im troublesome, screw myself up.

damnit and im crying again.

fuck life -.-

& hence i conclude life sucks ultrasuperman big balls these days. )':

someone help me plzzzzzz

I want to learn roller blading so badly... ):

On a HEAVIER note.

Ytd sucked big balls. -.-

Eeeeeeeeeeek. At least today wasn't an emo day like ytd... ):

I want Alps to end, I don't want it to end either.

Okay life sucks real bad.

Who wants the perfect guy? Not me. I don’t want anyone perfect. I don’t want anyone normal, that’s just boring. I want someone weird. I want someone unpredictable. I want someone who lets things slide and who loves to laugh and make me laugh. I want someone who will be crazy about me, and isnt afraid to let every one know it. I want him to be able to tell me to shut the hell up when I am bugging him. I want someone who challenges me, in every way. I want someone who puts up with my shit, but isn’t a push over. I want someone who pisses me off, but I can never be mad at, but perfect? That’s one thing I never want, maybe just perfect for me.

In six months i learnt how it feels like to fall sick and be like a zombie for 3 weeks because you cant accept sth, that i forgotten how to cry when im sad, i can only cry and feel hurt to know im still alive, i already lost myself to a person i dont recognise, i lost someone who taught me so much, i hurt for someone i dont even like, i can be so badly affected by someone i already dont even understand, i am a horrible person, i deserve all the bad things to befall me because i am utterly horrible person, i am selfish and hurt everyone around me, i am selfish and only care for myself, im not me, i cant find me, i suppress so much thoughts in me, i have the ability to let ppl i dun even know personally realise im sad, i cant get anything done right...

These six months felt like forever.

Do you know nothing has ever made me feel this way...?

Do you even care?

I already changed.

Already gone.